This Round Life

Reading Stephen King’s The Stand at the tender age of twelve invariably shaped my perception of the CDC. The Center for Disease Control was a serious, no-nonsense government organization – the kind with hazmat suits and large vans who swiftly descended to keep the population safe no matter what the cost.

Therefore, I was a bit taken aback to see that one of their chief worries this February wasn’t Captain Trips or even Type II Diabetes. No, it was ”Healthy Ways to Show your Love” this Valentine’s day. The third suggestion on their list: Give yourself or your loved ones a favorite healthy alternative to candy, such as a fruit basket or trail mix in a decorative box..

Maybe they're confusing health with birth control. Because, one thing's for certian, I don’t especially like chocolate but if my boyfriend gives me trail mix, he’s sleeping on the couch.

“Why don’t you eat something?”
”I’m not hungry enough yet”

2022 is a bad year. The wealthy dress like it’s the 1970’s, strawberries cost a hundred and fifty bucks a jar, most of the water has been poisoned, and food has become something old men dream about and young men can’t remember. Thank God for the Soylent Corporation – without them half the world would be starving.

Of course, starving might be better than living. The future is hot and dusty. Society limps along, patching together what they can of dying technology, feeding off the remains of better days. The population has exploded. Bodies are huddled over every surface and even the churches look like crowded corners of hell. The only bright colours are the occasional splashes of blood and the ominous Soylent Green tablets. Everything else is washed out – faded , and trodden. The future isn’t bright, it’s grim. Like the more recent Children of Men, the cinematography and art direction reinforce this, reminding the audience at every turn that this isn’t the future they were promised.

Across this landscape strides Charlton Heston. In a world where everyone is scrounging, the cops are scavengers. Detective Robert Thorn is no different. Called to the murder scene of a man connected to the board of Soylent, he takes statements as he casually swipes fresh towels and bourbon from the dead man’s apartment. Most cops would have taken the bourbon and called it a night but Thorn is tenacious. Something’s wrong here and he’s going to find out what. Where was the victim’s bodyguard? Why is the governor taking a personal interest in the case? Where can he get more of those nice fluffy towels? Just what’s in this Soylent Green stuff, anyway?

Soylent Green has become embedded popular culture. It’s been referenced in the Simpsons and people who have never seen the film can quote the famous ending line. “Soylent Green is…” has become almost as recognizable as “Take your stinking paws off me, you damn dirty ape!”. With good reason. It’s a cautionary tale that’s ahead of its time. It touched on global warming, and tampering with the food supply before they were “hot” topics and raised the point that it’s not only permissible to question what you’re told to eat and swallow – it’s vital.

People wonder why I’m suspicious of the weight loss industry when so many of their products have been either FDA approved or used by thousands of people. Maybe it’s because my parents sat me down at the ripe old age of eleven to watch Soylent Green.

Soylent Green is copyright 1973 Metro-Goldwyn-Mayer (MGM)